Konami Hyper Soccer review - Nintendo Entertainment System

Picture if you will, a pig farming genius from the 19th century. While his contemporaries were happy to eat bacon for breakfast and roast pork for supper, this chap dreamed of creating something magical from a pig's bladder. And then one day it hit him - "I know, I'll cut the bladder into strips, stitch it together, and inflate it!" Fellow pig farmers were not impressed, and complained that the roundness of the object meant it kept rolling off the frying pan. Quite understandably, the concept of football took some getting used to.

Back in the here and now, Konami bring Hyper Soccer to the NES, and there isn't a pig's bladder in sight. Instead, there are 24 teams representing as many nations, each with their own strength and weaknesses. Players can slide tackle, attempt diving headers, and even try for an overhead kick. When such skills have been acquired, a player can try his luck in the tournament.

Should this fail to provide enough tension, there is always the penalty kick competition to test nerve as well as skill. On top of that, the two-player option opens up the chance to thrash a friend. Developing passing skills to utilise strikers, quick reflexes to save goals, and intelligent middle of the park strategy are all important in unlocking the key to soccer success. And to think all this started with a pigs bladder! It's a funny ol' game!

What the Mean Machines staff thought

Being a keen football player as well as football fan, I naturally looked forward to this Konami soccer sim. Unfortunately, like a lot of its predecessors, this game fails to present a realistic impression of the game. The worst and most frustrating aspect is the game logic. I was impressed with the choice from 24 teams, each of varying skill, but once you're in the game there is no real difference. Teams like Japan are remarkably good against a side like the Germans. This is because the computer is perfect at tackling, even playing as the worst sides. This means that a lot of games end up goal-less and boring. Oh, and be warned about the penalties afterwards - the computer has an uncanny knack of reading where you are going to place the ball every time. Where I did find entertainment was in the two-player mode because playing a friend cuts out many of the problems I encountered playing the computer. Players still might kick for no reason at times, but you feel a bit more in control of the proceedings. The variety of options in Hyper Soccer promised much, but at the end of the day it's let down by poor logic and poor playability.

I was really hoping that I wouldn't have to write another comment that says "Oh no! Not another disappointing Nintendo soccer game". But here it is. Oh no! Not another disappointing Nintendo soccer game. It's not quite as bad as Nintendo World Cup and Goal!, but Hyper Soccer is still poor. It's well presented, but sadly it's let down by flawed gameplay and dreadful player logic. Your men just don't make themselves available for moves and always seem to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, which makes the proceedings frustrating. The graphics and sound are also very average, and the end result is a soccer game which provides little in the way of fun - even with two players.